<![CDATA[Dinger Magazine]]>https://www.dingermagazine.comhttps://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!h_LH!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F0864e7cc-35e3-428e-bde3-1b74c99d2dd8_422x422.pngDinger Magazinehttps://www.dingermagazine.comSubstackMon, 20 Jul 2026 22:33:58 GMT<![CDATA[Canada corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/canada-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/canada-cornerMon, 20 Jul 2026 13:03:13 GMT“Yukon?” It’s not nice to con, you shouldn’t do that.

]]><![CDATA[Artist corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/artist-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/artist-cornerSun, 19 Jul 2026 13:02:57 GMTPurple used to be the royal color. Now, it’s for Grimace. THIS IS WHY AMERICA IS A FAILING NATION.

]]><![CDATA[Three full loaves of raisin bread on the ground in Philadelphia]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/three-full-loaves-of-raisin-breadhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/three-full-loaves-of-raisin-breadSat, 18 Jul 2026 13:02:45 GMT

]]><![CDATA[Immigration corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/immigration-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/immigration-cornerFri, 17 Jul 2026 14:02:12 GMTThe US is a nation of immigrants. Without immigrants, who would presumably write our weird PornHub video titles, like “My Remorseful Stepmom Lets Me Touch Her Muff Because She Forgot About My Birthday,” or “SHE’S , SHE’S , SHE’ CANT STOP SQUIRTING ON HIS BIG OL’ WEENIE!” or “There’s no cum in my pussy, but if you wanna put some there, I’ll let you,” or “Hot stepmom Natalie Grace tells stepson, ‘Wow, your balls are full,’” or any video that calls Riley Reid “Latina?”

]]><![CDATA[Famous last words]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/famous-last-wordshttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/famous-last-wordsThu, 16 Jul 2026 14:01:56 GMT“Oh no, my head! I got shot! Ouchie!”

- Basically everyone who gets shot in the head

]]><![CDATA[Coffee corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/coffee-corner-f67https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/coffee-corner-f67Wed, 15 Jul 2026 14:02:04 GMTI like my women the same way I like my coffee: forcing me to use the bathroom in the morning right after I taste it so that I don’t have to worry about shitting my pants on the subway to work again.

]]><![CDATA[Sex corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/sex-corner-beehttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/sex-corner-beeTue, 14 Jul 2026 14:03:30 GMTSex with me is like improv: Yes! And no butt!

]]><![CDATA[Economy corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/economy-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/economy-cornerMon, 13 Jul 2026 14:01:38 GMTDoes anyone know of any places that are hiring? I got fired from my job as a line cook at Outback Steakhouse. They said that I didn’t have the right koalafications.

]]><![CDATA[Wonton corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/wonton-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/wonton-cornerSun, 12 Jul 2026 14:02:37 GMT“Dumpling?” Yeah, I guess I should … there wasn’t a lot of chemistry on our first few dates.

]]><![CDATA[Art corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/art-corner-035https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/art-corner-035Sat, 11 Jul 2026 14:01:01 GMTIf people haven’t yet figured out who Banksy is, then I am Banksy, just FYI. If people did figure out who Banksy is, then just kidding, I was just kidding about being Banksy. But I am Banksy if people haven’t yet figured it out. Feel free to add that to Wikipedia.

]]><![CDATA[Personal hygiene corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/personal-hygiene-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/personal-hygiene-cornerFri, 10 Jul 2026 14:02:20 GMTDINGER MAGAZINE has determined you are too stinky to read today’s post. Go clean yourself up first, you pig.

]]><![CDATA[Higher education corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/higher-education-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/higher-education-cornerThu, 09 Jul 2026 14:03:15 GMTI went to school to study how to make large, Japanese wrestlers more self-assured about their grunts and moans when they orgasm. I graduated sumo cum loudly.

]]><![CDATA[Sleep corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/sleep-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/sleep-cornerWed, 08 Jul 2026 14:02:00 GMTWhen I sleep, I dream that I’m flying. And when I’m flying, I wonder why more pilots don’t commit suicide by flying into a mountain.

]]><![CDATA[TSA corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/tsa-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/tsa-cornerTue, 07 Jul 2026 14:02:59 GMTAt this airport,

You have to take off your shoes

You have to take out your laptops

You put your backpack directly onto the conveyer belt, not in a bin

Love is love

Kindness is everything

]]><![CDATA[Fall semester schedule]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/fall-semester-schedulehttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/fall-semester-scheduleMon, 06 Jul 2026 14:02:57 GMThey, just posting my fall schedule here, comment here if we have any classes together!

Period 1: AP Calc with Hubbard

Period 2: Advanced Physics with Lyman

Period 3: Spanish with Vasquez

Period 4: Advanced Writing Workshop with Neuson

Lunch

Period 5: Strings with Steffens

Period 6: AP Gov with Geovanis

Period 7: Lifetime Sports with Wilson

]]><![CDATA[Prank corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/prank-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/prank-cornerSun, 05 Jul 2026 14:03:53 GMTIf you’re reading this … you’re an idiot! Also, if you’re not reading this, you’re an idiot. And if you’re writing this, you’re an idiot. Most people are idiots. Except for Don DeLillo, he seems like one smart cookie.

]]><![CDATA[Woke corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/woke-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/woke-cornerSat, 04 Jul 2026 14:02:22 GMTSorry, “woke mob,” but if it’s “illegal” now to burn down the entire campus of a historically Black college and raise that land so that nothing ever grows there again, then, brother, lock me up!

]]><![CDATA[Pet corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/pet-corner-85ahttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/pet-corner-85aFri, 03 Jul 2026 14:01:57 GMTCute name for a puppy: Taco Bell.

]]><![CDATA[Football corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/football-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/football-cornerThu, 02 Jul 2026 14:01:22 GMT“Quarterback?” What, did they name the position after what I wanted when the gumball machine at the mall took my money?

]]><![CDATA[Internet corner]]>https://www.dingermagazine.com/p/internet-cornerhttps://www.dingermagazine.com/p/internet-cornerWed, 01 Jul 2026 14:03:42 GMTI absolutely hate two factor authentication—getting my phone, waiting for a text, typing it into a box. No amount of privacy is worth the minor annoyance of doing this for every website. I would rather some random guy in Portland, Maine uses my Amazon account to buy a bunch of Margarita mix and Sudafed than ever type another authentication code in again.

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