Oh, these brains of ours!

Often, when I’m trying to stay awake, that’s when I fall asleep the fastest. And when I’m desperately trying to fall sleep, I find myself fully awake, unable to turn off my thoughts. And when I’m about to leave the house, I think, “Wait, where was I supposed to go?” And when I’m driving, I wake up to find that I’ve crashed my car through the glass facade of a Nike store, because I kept thinking, “For the love of God, you need to remember where you’re going and not fall asleep while driving again!”